A perfect model for how not to behave

Photo from Bleacherreport.com

Photo from Bleacherreport.com

Model the behavior you want to see. Time and again, Ted and I have come back to this as one of the cornerstone philosophies for how we parent. We learned long ago that lecturing—“do as I say”—really doesn’t stick. But kids do follow what their parents do. Model the behavior you want to see in your kids, and they pretty quickly start following your behavioral lead.

Of course, the primary reason Ted and I have to come back to this thinking is because we keep straying from it. Or, more accurately: We completely forget that our “cornerstone philosophy” even exists. We are abruptly reminded of it only when one of the kids acts like kind of a jerk. Then it starts niggling at the brain how that jerkiness seems awfully reminiscent of somebody, it’s just so familiar, who are they acting like—oh yeah. They’re acting like us.

Continue Reading

Fighting for his right to party?

Boof went to a party this past weekend. At a bar.

Photo from Gabe McIntyre (gabemac) via Flickr

Photo from Gabe McIntyre (gabemac) via Flickr

I don’t know whether this is just a trend in our region or if it’s also happening in other locales where there’s a prevalence of pampered teens with disposable income (i.e., spending money from Mom and Dad) and a misguided belief that having a social life is a right, but some venues around here are apparently making a killing hosting “teen nights.” Open only to high school kids, these events from my understanding are essentially meat markets for the Under 21 set.

Continue Reading

On V-day, some sentimental claptrap for my old friends

Photo from mdove64 via Flickr

Photo from mdove64 via Flickr

There’s a tendency among those who are married and have kids to grow insular. Or at least that’s the case for me, where the social network I’ve created in my household has eliminated any urgency with which I may have pursued friendships before marriage and kids. (Although, given the lack of interest by my household social network in engaging with me—unless they want something—I probably should feel greater urgency in making new friends… ) And, with a lot of my longtime friends now scattered around the country, most with spouses and kids of their own, I don’t hear from or even think of them often.

Continue Reading

Talk may be cheap, but it’s awkward too

Image from macinate on Flickr, via Fotopedia

Image from macinate on Flickr, via Fotopedia

My mom is currently in Japan, halfway through an eight-day trip to visit her siblings. Eight days of what I’m sure my dad is experiencing as bliss, during which he won’t be scolded for wearing old clothes or nagged to turn the music down. Eight days during which he won’t be forced to make conversation that he doesn’t want to make or listen to inane chatter that he doesn’t want to listen to. Eight days of peace and quiet.

That’s what my mom is worried about. Before she left for her trip last week, my mom texted me: Continue Reading